Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Broken Space Bar

I'm in the music mac lab, and since I am on the mac's, I can't do my drama speech. Well, I can't keeping going on with it, I could probably do something. Oh, I now remember how crappy this keyboard is. Dammit.

Gambit is in the new X-Men movie. It concerns me how little people know about the X-Men world. Well, not concerns, rather seemingly worries. I don't think worries works there either. Ah well.

Am I angry at anything.. no. Anything bothering me, at the moment.. no. Well, maybe. Am I stressing about anything.. no. I do feel unattractive. During the school hours, I slowly get paranoid and insecure. I may see my reflection in a window or mirror, notice someone's judging stare or listen too closely on what people are saying about me. I can end the day feeling rather low.

I am OK with my own paranoia. No one seems to justify my feelings, so I could simply be making mountains out of molehills. Still doesn't stop my daily ritual of self analysis and peer checking. I need to lose my baggage, and work to some change. I guess.

I once wanted to be a doctor. Back in the day. At that point in my life, I believed I wouldn't be able to cope with the blood and such. That concept is unquestionable these days. I have no qualms about blood and guts. I do, though, have different dreams and aspirations. Its a game out there, the ultimate competition. Lives are chosen through the gamble we take to play. Eventually, we will be able to stop this sport and just be happy with our prizes.

All the worlds a stage.

eMacs are shite.


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